1. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat
you with experience.
3. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright
until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
8. Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good Evening,’ and then proceed to
tell you why it isn’t.
10. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train
stops. On my desk, I have a work station.
12. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, ‘In case of
emergency, notify: I put ‘DOCTOR.’